This is the most difficult penned missive I have typed on this thing that computes.
And it is not why you think. You see, I was eating a popped snack just a little while ago and an unpopped thing fell onto this pad that I type on and got wedged beneath the key that belongs to the unit of alphabet that denotes … hmm, I can’t even type it … it is the one between “e” and “t” on the keypad.
Do you know the key I mean? It is the sound made by the captain of a not nice ship and its scallywag boat people who become employed on it. Captain Kidd is an example.
You know: “(Fill in Blank) Billy, have you lately been to sea?”
Uggh! You can see the difficulties I am having. The adjective I wanted to use is not “lately”, so you have to substitute in the exact adjective I meant.
I can’t believe how many times I use that – umm — key in one day.
Oh well, I must get this begunned: this is the special Fool’s Day issue of What’s Up Yukon. Sadly, the place that we get this issue made had a bad thing happen: they put the pages in upside down.
This page is the only one they got done the way that it was supposed to get done.
I am positive they made many attempts to get this done in a way that makes us satisfied as they often do.
My only guess is that anything that is made on that one special day that falls exactly one month ahead of May 1 is doomed to fail in one way as opposed to a distinct way.
Is anybody still digesting this penned missive? We have 2,000 of these special Whazzup Yukons made up on this Fools’ Day. Of those, I bet 1,800 will begin digesting this missive and I am positive only 32 have made it to this point.
My Mom, bless the kind soul she is, likely stopped at “Uggh!”
I need 575 adjectives, nouns, etc to fill this space. Please allow me a moment to hit my “Count” button: only 359.
Uggh!
OK, how many now: 366.
Uggh!
As I was saying, this issue (except this page) is upside down. If you lived in that nation west of New Zealand (you know, the big island that is also a continent), then this would not be an issue.
OK, now I am getting mad! That was a funny, funny joke. But without the use of that one key, it just comes out sounding odd.
433.
Uggh!
Anyway, this doesn’t look good on us. All of the kind pals who place these issues in the businesses that they own will have to flip them upside down so that people can tell what is communicated to them.
I apologize to all of those people.
(Hey, have you noticed that the cadence of this missive sounds like an e-mail coming out of that nation to the west of Libya and Chad?)
I shall continue: If you enjoy these issues while sitting on the toilet, I am happy to let you know that you do not have to sit upside down. You can just flip this issue upside down.
If you use this issue to begin a flame in that place-of-flames-that-heat-homes, then I can console you with the guess that the smoke will, indeed, go up and not down.
By now, only two of you have stuck with this missive so, what the heck, just give me a phone call and I will explain it all to you.
And when you phone, I will ask that you acquit us of this mistake and I will wish you a fun time digesting Whazzup Yukon.
