All I want for Mother’s Day is a great big hug.
It is the one thing that never fails to make me happy. Even after the craziest, most-challenging and stress-inducing days. When my child runs up to me and wraps his arms around my neck, as he snuggles into me, all my stresses vanish. It’s like magic.
After all, it is the very first thing we did together after my Little Buddy was born. After hours of intense labour, the pain seemed to fall to the back of my mind as the nurse placed his little body on top of my chest. He clung to me and I kissed his tiny head. It made everything that led up to that point absolutely worth it.
And that is an interesting thought.
Mothers are able to push their bodies to the very limit during the birth of their children. We push through excruciating pain (our bodies often tearing apart), sometimes under threat of severe complications—all in an effort to meet and hug the little human that has been growing inside of us for the last nine months. It’s an extraordinary feat.
As someone who is quite the lightweight when it comes to pain, I sometimes still can’t believe I was able to do it. More so that I’d be willing to do it all over again if it meant that I’d get the chance to capture the moment of meeting my sweet child, again, for the first time. Talk about magic!
‘’It’ll be over soon. You’ll meet your son and you’ll hold him tight. You can do this!’’ It’s the promise that got me through labour, and I’ll never forget how much the mental image of that first hug meant to me. How much my desire for it helped me push myself harder than I truly believed I could.
No wonder I still can’t get enough of the hugs. And no wonder they can change my day, my mindset, my feelings of doubt or frustration.
They heal me.
The warm embrace envelops my entire being, and suddenly it is just the two of us and the rest of the world melts away. I kiss the top of his head and all the hardships decide they can wait and do not dare interrupt. It’s as though this act of connection is stronger than any shield that one might create, and it’s something that I always lament when he pulls away. And he must be the one to pull away.
I read recently that at Disney theme parks, the characters in meet-and-greets are asked to never be the first one to let go when a child hugs them. I guess the idea is that you might not know how much a child needs that hug, and as someone they trust and turn to, you should try to be there for them as long as they need.
This has stuck with me. And I have made the conscious choice to never be the one to pull away first when my son hugs me now. Whether he notices or not, it brings me joy to know that I’m there for as long as he needs me to hold him.
In those moments, I try to take a mental snapshot. Because I know that trying to get an actual picture of us hugging is nearly impossible these days. The moment he knows a camera is around, he hams it up and all he wants to do is dance around and act silly. His need for the hug disappears into a desire to pose for a funny picture. He’s a goofball, in the most charming way, and I love him for it.
Yes, those mental pictures are important, as I know one day (as he gets older) he’ll likely go through phases of not wanting to hug me as often. Those daily moments of joy will occur a little further apart, and these memories will have to do. The thought makes me a little sad, even though I know it’s normal and all a part of watching my child grow up.
So, this Mother’s Day, all I want is a hug from my Little Buddy. And I will make sure my son and I reach out across the country to my own mother and mother-in-law, with a virtual one. After all, I know I’m not the only mom out there who feels like I do about the power of their child’s hug.
Plus, I can only imagine what a grandchild’s hug must feel like.
Just like heaven, I’m sure.
