It was a beautiful day to hunt for grouse—spruce grouse to be precise.
Me and my friend Konstantine had aligned our schedules to see if we could get a late season hunt in before the grouse were off limits (the season runs Sept. 1–Nov. 30). We met in the late morning, loaded our gear into his trusty Toyota truck and headed out to find some small game.
Now as far as hunters go, I am a total newbie; and he, an experienced hunter. The first indication of this was when it came to outdoor gear. Konstantine’s outfit consisted of sturdy hiking boots (there was only about 2 cm of snow—and that was out in the boonies!).
I, however, had large, thoroughly insulated and sweat-inducing winter boots (it was only -7 Celsius). Atop his incredibly practical boots were a smart pair of waterproof gaiters, where I wore snowboarding pants, complete with suspenders. At least they didn’t make the classic swishing sound you all remember from the old days of snow pants that we wore in public school (and were mocked incessantly for!). In addition, he wore comfortable long johns and jeans and a warm jacket, with gloves and a hat. I wore a woefully inadequate (yet highly fashionable) jacket and vest combo that let the cold seep in (insert facepalming emoji here). At least I had good gloves and toque and even a neck gaiter that helped to keep falling snow out of my jacket.
Even our choice of firearm was the polar opposite. He, with his venerable shotgun; and me, with a .22 rim-fire. Apparently, I like to suffer for my work (trust me, people, you have not seen me shoot).
But the most profound difference (at least to me) was the moment he pulled forth a mesh hunting bag in which to place the harvested birds. A bag! I sheepishly looked down at the sad excuses for pockets in my not-made-for-winter-hunting jacket and muttered a curse or two under my breath. You live. You learn.
So off we went. Not even trudging! The trail was easy to follow, and every 50 metres or so we would veer off the path, either left or right, and do a small loop among the trees, scanning high and low for our quarry. On the second foray into the woods, we had just walked about 30 feet before we heard the telltale flutter and then saw a spruce grouse hightail it from a lofty tree branch, over our heads, and into the trees on the opposite side of the trail.
Off we went, again scanning the lower branches, secretly hoping we had encountered a grouse that had a low IQ. No such luck. With Konstantine stalking and me watching the trees, the wily bird had been watching us closely and, when it felt the hunters were a little too close for comfort, bolted deeper into the forest. Onward we go. Now, for experienced hunters, tracking game and keeping your bearings comes from, well, experience! Like walking and chewing bubble gum, right? For me, it was more of an exercise in crisis management as I tried to keep an eye on Konstantine (so I knew his location) and scan the trees to see if and when the grouse popped out—and also sneaking quick glances over my shoulder in a vain attempt to align myself with the trail.
One last flutter and the sound of beating wings and the grouse launched itself from cover and beelined for some exceptionally dense brush. At that point, the two hunters looked at one another and agreed to go back to the trail.
The following conversation amounted to an agreement that this particular grouse was one of the smart ones (good for him) and not one of the dumb ones (bad for us). I guess all the dumb ones got bagged already. On the bright side, the smart grouse could go on to make more smart grouse and thus be more challenging to hunt—albeit, that would actually be bad for me! Remember you have not seen me shoot …
Grouse 1. Hunters 0.
After a few more attempts at finding a grouse, we decided to call it a day and go drink beer somewhere instead. As far as hunting experiences go, it was pretty good in my book. Just having the opportunity to go walk on the land and be outside (and somewhat comfortable), in mid-November, was amazing in itself. Getting an opportunity to have a friend teach me about hunting and seeing those best practices put into action was also something I am grateful for and will now be able to build upon going forward.
I am excited to get out on the land once more and pit myself against a worthy adversary—which in this case is a spruce grouse. A very smart spruce grouse, mind you!
